QUEST FOR THE PERFECT COCKTAIL DRESS

by admin on June 6, 2011

nicole miller dress

ever since esme attending the pebble beach food and wine and felt woefully underdressed in her european culture pant suit, she has been contemplating the notion of looking for an actual cocktail dress—-one like many of the pebble beach women were wearing:  skintight, shiny, spandexy, to the knee or above, sleeveless or off-the-shoulder.  esme has certainly never had a dress like this (except perhaps one she bought with kate to go to a singles affair–kate dubbed it esme’s “va va voom dress”– but that was MANY years ago!)

anyway, esme also never imagined she could or would wear such a dress.  but, she began to be curious, wondering what it would be like to find a few and just try them on.  the carmel area is not a great place to shop for such an item, and certainly esme’s usual haunts do not carry any such garments.  the idea of finding one in say, sylvie, is downright laughable!

however, esme thought of a few places that might be worth a try.  the first that came to mind was paloosh, a store in downtown carmel that often displays diane von furstenbergs in their window.  riffling through the purple/gray/blue section, esme came upon a number of possibilities.  one was a really cool-looking dvf in a multi-colored deconstructed silk, another dvf in cobalt blue, and a nicole miller number in an eggplant colored knit.

well, the first thing that esme discovered was that some of these dresses are tiny, especially in the bust.  she squished into the deconstructed one, which, although a great idea, was completely shapeless and looked ridiculous on esme!  the cobalt blue was low-waisted and drapey—just the sort of thing esme is usually attracted to—but also looked silly.

finally, esme tried on the nicole miller.  it was really difficult to get into, having a small side zip and a fairly high neck.  however, once in, esme was quite astounded at how….sexy…she looked!  this dress was sleeveless, ruched and fitted, somehow managing to show one’s curves while de-emphasizing one’s bulges!  genuis!  the only thing was, the fabric, while a lovely color, was a knit, and thus more casual than esme had in mind.

the next day esme trotted over to macy’s to see what she could see.  they had a rather sad little section of cocktail dresses which somehow managed to look tacky rather than glamourous.  and no dvf’s……  esme did manage to find a few frocks to try on.  one in particular was made of a lovely silvery gray fabric, with a deep v-neck and nice ruching.  however, esme was quite unable to completely zip up the bodice!  goodness—these dresses are made for people with no boobs!!

she did note that, with the addition of heels and make-up, she would have looked like an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT PERSON could she have worn this dress.  mr. noir would not have recognized her!!!  add some hair-color and a bit of plastic surgery and she would have looked so pebble-beach even her own mother would have passed her by on the street. and she just knew that men of all ages would have gaped!!!

the next day her neck and back were killing her!  a first she couldn’t figure it out.  then it came to her:  squeezing in and out of those dresses must have done it!  omg, this is so sad.  perhaps if she bought one she could just wear it 24/7, and have her maid help her out of it for the occasional shower!

ah fantasy!

esme

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