by admin on July 8, 2011

lyn-genet recitas - THE PLAN

the evils of oatmeal???

you may not know that in addition to being addicted to shopping, esme is addicted to fashion magazines.  she can withstand almost any doctor’s-office wait if they have plenty of reading material in the waiting room.  esme has been a long-time reader of VOUGE, recently added ELLE, and on the advice of a swimming buddy,  decided to subscribe to MORE.  MORE’S subtitle is:  “for women of style and substance”.  hmmmm……sounds a bit un-fun, but who can deny that esme is a woman of style and substance (i.e. not a young woman)?

i’m slightly embarrassed to admit that the first thing that caught esme’s eye in the july issue was an article entitled “america’s next top diet guru?”  the editor is to be commended for adding the question mark.  in addition, the editor herself tried the diet (or non-diet), with results that “changed my life” (i.e. she lost her muffin-top and didn’t have to sell her wardrobe on e-bay).  how could one resist?

i’m sure that you are as fed up with the constant changes in recommended foods/diets as is esme.  first it’s no fat.  then it’s only good fat.  one month it’s no carbs.  another it’s no sugar. oops, make that no high-fructose corn syrup.   remember the old days when carbs were recommended and we all made pasta several times a week?   coffee is bad for you.  then, coffee staves off cancer.  and alcohol—-let’s not even go there!  so esme takes any such recommendation with a huge grain of salt (oh no, salt is definitely bad for you!).  perhaps mr. noir’s technique, which is to be oblivious to the diet articles in women’s magazines, fitness magazines, and even the local paper, has something to recommend it.

in any case, this new diet disses some of esme’s favorite foods—foods which we’ve all been told are must-have’s in the aging baby-boomer’s diet.  to whit:  oatmeal and salmon.  the diet’s author, lyn-genet recitas, claims that “oatmeal is the devil” (i.e. it makes you fat)!  could this be responsible for esme’s years’ long struggle with her 3-5pounds??

the diet begins with a 3-day “cleanse”.  this has always sounded ghastly to esme, but when she looked at the details it wasn’t too bad:  one gets to eat actual food, even if it is heavy on the kind that starts out with roots.  apparently most people lose 3 or more pounds just from the cleanse!  esme can only assume this is mostly water-weight, but who knows?  then one gradually adds in other foods.  if you gain half a pound after eating a certain food, it’s bad for you.  the logic behind all this sounds like complete hocus-pocus.  even the editor admits that the science behind it is weak or non-existent.  however, who’s to argue with results?

esme did like a few things about this diet.  in fact, for a brief moment she was tempted to try it, until she blinked her eyes and came to her senses.  (actually what happened was she realized the diet necessitated a lot of cooking, not esme’s forte.)  one thing she liked was that, as the more article puts it, the diet shifts the emphasis from “i gained 2 pounds; i must have done something wrong” to “i gained 2 pounds; something i ate isn’t right for my body.”  another one was that the food involved didn’t sound half-bad.

here’s the problem though: esme loves her oatmeal and salmon!  she was thinking of giving up the former for a few days, only to awaken to a foggy  morning where only a nice bowl of oatmeal would take off the chill!

responses, readers??

waiting to see,



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