TENNIS ATTIRE: TIME FOR AN UPDATE

by admin on November 26, 2012

how about these?

esme tries to keep her posts positive…she really does.  but my eyes have been offending me lately when i watch the lady tennis players of my own age at my gym.  so rather than plucking out my eyes (i need them for awhile longer, thank you), i’m going to recommend a sartorial revision.

when i was growing up, one had to wear white on the courts.  nowadays, tennis outfits come in all sorts of beguiling colors.  however, the style for women remains a butt-length skirt with matching panties and a sleeveless top.  this is fine up until the age of…..oh, let’s just say 45.  but as the flesh begins to sag and the varicose veins take over, a little skirt that shows the upper thighs is just not……appealing.  to make matters worse, women tennis players are in the habit of stashing extra balls (!) in their matching panties and whipping them out as needed.  need i say that i find the whole thing a little……gross?

perhaps i could forgive all this (i know i should), but the tennis ladies at our club have a certain truculent stance, and have been known to complain about the swimmers making too much noise.  swimmers??  noisy??  this is not to say that most of them aren’t perfectly fine on an individual basis, but as a group…..

so, i’d like to propose an updated tennis outfit.  yoga and workout clothes comes in all sorts of fetching shapes and colors these days.  indeed, it seems to be a retail cliche to start a line of workout wear.  how about some breathable just-above-the-knee-length tennis capris?  a tennis version of yoga pants?  some side pockets to hold one’s balls?  perhaps some tailored culottish things?  anything to flatter (i.e. cover) the thighs of the woman of a certain age.  don’t even ask about the men…..

if thine eyes offend thee……,

esme

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